Wednesday, December 20, 2006

BlogPoll Awards: Part 1

Info Here. Nominate Here (open to readers).

The Dr. Z Award

FOR: Cogent, interesting analysis.

CRITERIA: Emphasis placed on statistical manipulation, well researched pieces that reveal something new, and/or solid argumentative pieces that function as the authoritative last word on a subject.

MGoBlog- It should be noted that had I not been sent a link to one of Brian’s Upon Further Review entries during the 2005 season, I probably would not have a blog. His Third Down Efficiency expedition could blow dandruff off a man’s scalp.

iBlog For Cookies- Vijay’s highlight recaps alone, which unfortunately seem to have slowly disappeared with the advent of YouTube, were one of the most satisfying recurring features to be found – used both as an analysis resource and means to savor the dying embers of Steve Breaston’s career. Admirable composure regardless of content or the oblivious Notre Dame douche bags that set Vijay out to prove them wrong in the first place.

Burnt Orange Nation- Under the Hood feature is as enviably thorough as anything you’d see in a media guide, and his weekly position reviews are written better than much of what I see in print journalism. Peter saw the Brantley de-commit miles before any of us, which was simply the most recent example of his perceptiveness.

Blue Gray Sky- Scholars of the game, eternally loyal, and fans of all that math and science stuff their school’s Catholic overlords shake fingers at; worth the hype their painfully overrated football team isn’t.

Sunday Morning Quarterback- If as much time was taken collecting praise from various internets as is evidently put into daily entries, the testimonial sidebar has all the potential to read like an Ayn Rand chapter.

The Trev Alberts Quits To Do Construction Award

FOR: comic relief; overall hilarity.

CRITERIA: The funniest college football blog.

Every Day Should Be Saturday: In response to Bill Simmons’ live blog of last year’s Rose Bowl:

We (care about it), Bill. It doesn’t make sense, but neither does caring about the NBA or watching 90210. It’s the vestiges of something called “being regional,” which you may understand if we put it this way–it’s paying attention to events occurring outside of the Boston metropolitan area and watching a few new shows, reading a few new books, and dropping the horrifically clumsy hip-hop references thrown in to ward off the creaking obsolescence of your writing, even though you live in L.A. now and should be picking up some new material.

Here’s a comb, Bill – you just got your mother fucking wig rocked.

Tressel’s World- Just about as baffling as anything you’ll ever read, but impossible to omit when its produced things like “I’ll knock freckles off Lindsay Lohan’s tits.” A passage from the inaugural post:

The other day I was at Cost-Co with the misses, we had to find a new remote because, her dog, Waffles, chewed the fuck out of it. I hate that dog, Man, what I wouldn't give for a sack of bricks and a bridge. So yeah, I'm looking for a new remote control for the TV, and I buy one, but have you ever tried to tried program one of those muther fuckers. I'll tell you, it's like Chinese Algebra, I was so stressed by the time I was done, I had to go pop a few beebees into my neighbors retarded kid. It's cool with him, cause I hook him up with free tickets.

The site description, which reads “I'm not all football. I got things to say. I write poetry about things, alot of things that aren't about football. This site is about those things,” perfectly represents the irony of Tressel’s persona: Tressel’s a guy who, with endless ambiguities and the wardrobe of a Social Studies teacher, paints himself as a character so simple and harmless he’s actually corny, yet in all actuality he’s the malevolent mastermind of one of the dirtiest programs in college athletics. The description of the blog satisfies similar objectives, albeit satirically.

Fire Mark May- Frequently drops bombs on ESPN, which is usually a recipe for success; Jim Rome is constantly on left coast time. He is still really into Pogs.” I’m sure one on a career path similar to mine would benefit more from reading things like FMM, but the core curriculum for most English departments mandates we discuss how Kate Chopin’s writing was influenced by the fact that she clearly didn’t get fucked enough instead. A travesty.

Hey Jenny Slater- An excellent writer with a firm grip on popular culture, often evident when his football posts evolve into political and social critiques – as seen here.

The Sports Fans Don't Cry Award

FOR: The blog that has suffered through its chosen team's dismal season with the most dignity.

CRITERIA: Continued engagement in the face of crippling, misery-inducing defeat. A stiff-upper lip and sane reaction to everything crumbling to dust.

Bruins Nation- One of the most vindicating moments of the 2006 season was witnessing UCLA defeat Southern Cal, and watching the celebration commence on Nestor’s blog in the ensuing days. There is not a YouTube highlight in existence from that game that has not been published over there – and I have no basis for that but there’s at least a 90% chance that I’m right. Karl Dorrell spent the season with a tormented look on his face that made his inner anguish incredibly evident; it wasn’t just because he knew thousands didn’t like him, but as if he was slowly starting to dislike himself as well. And when UCLA had actually won, Dorrell’s soul mended – if only until the next game – Bruins Nation forgave him. Or rather, they were willing to ignore the past, because in this painful game we worship, the present always has the possibility for redemption. It’s in a fan’s true nature to forgive, to want to forgive, and watching them find solace in one game despite 11 others brought me great joy. Without a doubt the best a team other than Michigan has ever made me feel.

Ian at the FanHouse, Orange 44, The Bemusement Park


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